Too wet? Too dry?

"Ich dachte du wärst erregt, weil du warst doch feucht", könnt ihr euch also sparen. Da gibt es z.B. noch das Anschwellen der äußeren Vulvalippen die auch darauf hindeuten. Oder ihr beobachtet euer Gegenüber und versucht achtsam wahrzunehmen, wie weit die Person ist. Oder die Person sagt euch was sie jetzt möchte.

Ist es zu trocken benutzt Gleitgel. Wird es trocken mit der Zeit, benutzt Gleitgel zwischendurch.

Ist es zu feucht könnt ihr eine kurze Pause machen und abwischen. Ich hab gelesen, dass manche kurz ein Tampon benutzen um die Feuchtigkeit auch innerhalb der Vagina aufzusaugen. Wenn´s hilft, warum nicht. Stellungswechsel kann auch dazu führen, dass die Reibung wieder bemerkbar wird.

Wichtig:

Redet miteinander. Wenn ihr noch nicht so weit seid, sagt es. Denkt dran, die Vagina muss auch Zeit haben sich zu dehnen, sonst tut es auch weh. Und alles andere (zu trocken, zu feucht) lässt sich gut regeln. Lasst es auch köerplich nochmal abklären zur Sicherheit.

***

Yesterday I ended the post with:
"Vaginal moisture/dryness really says nothing at all about the degree of arousal, but it can be an indication."

People often believe that they can recognize the degree of arousal through vaginal moisture (lubrication). The wetter, the more aroused.
This is a misconception. Why the vagina becomes moist or not is controlled by many physical and psychological factors.

The vagina generally has a moist and rather acidic environment. Depending on the nature of the secretions, the timing of the cycle can be determined. Sometimes it is thicker/thinner, sometimes milky, sometimes clear. If it is a different color, it may indicate an infection or that menstruation is imminent.

The lubrication that is produced during arousal is usually clearer and thinner. Physical reasons why it may be disturbed (too moist/dry) are

•  a hormonal imbalance, e.g. pregnancy, menopause, oestrogen deficiency, hormonal contraceptive methods, other medication
• ovulation
• an existing illness (infections, diabetes, (bladder) inflammation)
• Excessive intimate hygiene

Psychological reasons can be:

• stress
• not aroused enough
• conflicts
• fears
• boredom

When aroused, the vagina secretes fluid via glands to make the friction more pleasant (for both) and to reduce any injuries that could occur. This means that a vulva wearer does not have to be emotionally aroused. Sometimes moisture is also a physical protective function. Like when someone tickles you and you automatically laugh, but don't find it funny.

So we realize:
Lubrication says nothing about the actual level of arousal. There are several reasons for over/underproduction.

"I thought you were aroused because you were wet", so you can save yourself the trouble. There is also the swelling of the outer vulva lips, for example, which also indicates this. Or you can watch the other person and try to be aware of how far they are. Or the person can tell you what they want now.

If it's too dry, use lube. If it gets dry over time, use lube in between.

If it's too wet, you can take a short break and wipe it off. I've read that some people use a tampon briefly to soak up the moisture inside the vagina. If it helps, why not. Changing position can also cause the friction to become noticeable again.

Important:

Talk to each other. If you're not ready yet, say so. Remember, the vagina must also have time to stretch, otherwise it will also hurt. And everything else (too dry, too wet) can be easily regulated. Have it checked again by a doctor to be on the safe side.